I don’t do crossroads, I do corners

After what seems to be years, but in reality is just a few months, I finally have finally seemed to turn a corner. Getting to crossroads tends to suggest two options from which to choose but I’ve never been in that position, I’ve always been on the right side of the path but sometimes I… Continue Reading I don’t do crossroads, I do corners

I’m going to talk, are you listening?

A few weeks ago I got a letter through the door telling me I was due for an ESA reassessment. Part of me dreaded looking at the form and so I didn’t for a few days and allowed myself to feel panicked and because I allowed that feeling it passed. When I looked at it… Continue Reading I’m going to talk, are you listening?

Waiting for Kafka

I am in constant preparation for the next bout of episodes. I always hope that episodes will be of the long kind as they’re much more gentle on my body and mind (though still incredibly destructive) but those are an increasingly distant memory. Unfortunately for me I rapid cycle and rarely do anything else and,… Continue Reading Waiting for Kafka

Moving on in more ways than one…

It’s ten days since I had the big chat with my GP and knew that my life had to change. Bipolar Disorder is a hard task master and at times it chains me to the wall and leaves me for dead. I am still mourning the loss of overnight stays away but that is tempered… Continue Reading Moving on in more ways than one…

Grieving for the end of an era…

Anyone who has experienced the sudden loss of a person that they love will know how grief feels. They will know the feeling of waking each day and being in whatever their range of normality is and then sudden remembrance that the person is gone. That is how I’m waking each day and yet I… Continue Reading Grieving for the end of an era…

The Co-op, Council, Citizens Advice Bureau & the consequences

This blog is about something that happened a long time ago but I still feel the effects from it even now and it is something I’ll never stop being angry about. It’s not about hurt feelings or dismissive behaviour it’s about the stripping of dignity under the guise of banking policy and voluntary work. When… Continue Reading The Co-op, Council, Citizens Advice Bureau & the consequences

One thing at a time, living without chocolate & being less manic

I have this great friend who acts as my soundboard and does this kind of motivation coach  (I know, it sounds awful) thing with me. After a five or six years of not being in touch I rang him because my life was in mess and I wanted to talk about somebody taking over my… Continue Reading One thing at a time, living without chocolate & being less manic

Just when you thought I’d shut up…

I haven’t written here for a while because I’ve been a bit busy. I have a voluntary job which I can do when I want and to what extent I want. I write articles about charities for a community website and I’m the one in the driving seat. This week I’ve been writing for that… Continue Reading Just when you thought I’d shut up…

Planning, Photographs, Pokémon Go and a Pie

I have started putting the decisions I made into action and it feels quite good. Today I sent the email that delivers my opinions on a report but also, just before I signed it, says I’m not going to be doing any community work any more. I’m going to attend community meetings (perhaps) but that’s… Continue Reading Planning, Photographs, Pokémon Go and a Pie

Decisions, decisions, decisions

I’m not good at doing nothing. I have to be doing something and the art of doing nothing has become about mindfulness – I’ve been practising proper mindfulness for over 10 years not this concentrate on your breathing crap that people sell as mindfulness. Mindfulness isn’t doing nothing of course, you’re actually acutely aware of… Continue Reading Decisions, decisions, decisions