It’s amazing how much more time I’ve had this week since I’ve not tweeted. I’m struggling really badly with looking after myself and I’m not improving any in the bipolar sense but I’m spending more time sitting and being.
Sitting and being is very important and that’s extended into sitting and being and reading or listening to the radio. I’m spending longer outside with Ogden and talking that talk you do with other dog owners. None of it is very deep and we know the name of the dogs not the name of the owner but it’s okay because I’m interacting with people without being involved with them.
I’m having fun catching up on editing photos and I’m still sharing them on Twitter via third party site (just like I do with my blog) but I don’t have to be on Twitter to do that (and I’m not feeling obliged to check notifications about them either!). I’ve deleted some more apps since I got rid of the Twitter ones – nothing particularly flash or exciting just the mundane type of things that interrupt life without actually bringing anything into it.
So the decluttering goes on, the books get read, the radio is listened to, the television is watch and I, hopefully, will begin to heal in all this peace. Healing will take time as it always does after a big crash. I haven’t hit rock bottom yet, that’s realistic and based on experience not mindless projection, but I will and then the crawl back up begins. Hopefully I’ll have more or at least more useful medication by then.
Meanwhile it’s back to editing photos and while I’ll be doing that I’ll be smiling a bit because it’s just occurred to me that I can write any old shit on here that I want because it’s my any old shit. How good is that?